Fear and Parenting in Las Vegas

Okay. I realize I skipped August. If you haven’t noticed lately, my personal snow globe’s been shaking like Shakira’s hips for the past few weeks, so cut a girl a break.

Anyway, it gives me great pleasure to award my Perfect Post Award for September 2008 to none other than Kristen at Mommy Needs a Cocktail for her post, Don’t Stay at the Bellagio.

No, my award isn’t just because she gave me a shout-out in it. It’s not because I’m looking for a free shirt either (although I do like this one in a large).

It’s because she survived a harrowing experience in my fair city and giving her an award will hopefully lure her back someday. Hell, I’m no Bellagio, but she can stay in Boo’s purple room. Homer’s offered to pull out the super soakers in in the pool while Doodle and I play “Hey Big Spender” on kazoo beneath her window.

Really, her post is as hilarious as it it horrifying. But was it all a ploy to avoid the blogger meet-up? Hmmm. Really I’m not that scary. Just ask Claudia. She can tell you I know where the cool kids play.

Alright my friend. I couldn’t buy your prego gloriousness a drink, so I’ll do you one better. This one’s for you.

Be sure to check out the other recipients at Suburban Turmoil and Petroville. It’ll be well worth your nickel.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2q38iXOigE&feature=related]

I don’t know who thought it would be a good idea to turn the blender that is my life to “Emulsify,” but I sure wish they’d pull the plug. My brain has turned to complete mush and not even the covalent bonds of a Starbuck’s mint mocha chip frappuchino can pull it together.

I’m usually someone who’s on top of things. My kids show up looking like they could be on the cover of a catalog. These days, they’re better suited for a cover of National Geographic.

My in-laws celebrated their 81st birthdays in August. Their presents are still sitting in our office. Let’s not talk about the anniversary card that didn’t get sent recognizing their 58th.

I’m supposed to be launching my Savvy Source blog in two days. I still have to get 10 more posts in before tomorrow. And I’m supposed to have a list of 100 places kids can take classes or do activities. Hmmm. Did I mention that I have a day job?

Don’t get me started. It amazes me that they still let me in the door each morning. I can’t seem to master simple tasks like getting a repeating appointment to show up on my calendar. Let’s not talk about the typos I had to fix on a presentation this afternoon.

Homer and I just realized that we’re supposed to have a hiking date later this month, but neither one of us knows exactly the date or time we committed to. Heaven help us if we double-booked.

I just spent my evening running around town getting auction items for two school fundraisers (realizing the items are due tomorrow) and getting up to date on the other commitments we’re obligated to for Boo’s school. The last hour was consumed with recruiting babysitters to help us juggle the kids between all of these things and my upcoming trip to the Motor City (which happens to be the same weekend as one of these fundraisers).

Wanna know what’s the scariest part of all? I know this is all going to get worse before it gets better. Doodle will have his scout/soccer/chess club (or whatever he ends up in) stuff before I know it.

I think I’ll be asking Mr. Santa Jobs for an iBrain this year for Christmas. It’s either that or a new blender. Prederably one that maxes out at “chop.”

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6buCVDdERg]